No Water Fountains

Wow, what a day of radio. I recorded with Tim Hawkins, Isaac Witty, David Pendleton, and Riley Armstrong. Then I was a guest on Jeff Allen’s new podcast, “An Examined Life.” The Electro-Voice RE20 had a little smoke coming off it when I was done.

Jeff is a terrific host and we chatted about all things comedy and life — solving a majority of the worlds problems in under 35 minutes. Sherlock and Watson would have been proud. Of course, they don’t actually really exist, but then again, neither does any evidence that Jeff and I have the smarts to solve any real problems.

I just got chewed out my son who caught me drinking out of the kitchen faucet — which I’ve forbidden he children to do. He accused me of being a hypocrite. I explained that I am allowed to drink out of the faucet because my lips don’t actually touch the faucet itself, and when children drink from it, they tend to put their mouths on the faucet — sometimes capturing the full pressure of the faucet into their gullets and unintentionally blasting a significant volume of water out their nose and ears, followed by lots of gasping for breath and coughing over all the bread and butter left on the kitchen counter.

It’s the mouth on the faucet thing that makes me avoid public drinking fountains. Drinking out of a public fountain is really like locking lips with the community at large. When I drink water, I don’t want to indirectly kiss Kevin Bacon.

By the way, did you hear that Bone Hampton was one of the guys that got stuck on the Atlanta highway overnight in the car during the terrible snow storm? Of course, when I say the snowstorm in Atlanta was terrible, I’m just saying the following: snow fell in Atlanta. That seem silly to people like me who live in Minnesota. Of course, people from Atlanta think that it’s more silly to live in Minnesota. I can’t really argue that point.

Bone is just fine now. I got to interview him recently and it’s now on the new podcast. You can hear by clicking here: